I remember / je me souviens

I remember / je me souviens

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For those limbic bursts of nostalgia, invented by Proust, miniaturized by Nicholson Baker, and freeze-dried by Joe Brainard in his I remember and by Georges Perec in his Je me souviens.

But there are no fractions, the world is an integer
Like us, and like us it can neither stand wholly apart nor disappear.
When one is young it seems like a very strange and safe place,
But now that I have changed it feels merely odd, cold
And full of interest.
--John Ashbery, "A Wave"

Sometimes I sense that to put real confidence in my memory I have to get to the end of all rememberings. That seems to say that I forego remembering. And now that strikes me as an accurate description of what it is to have confidence in one's memory.
--Stanley Cavell, The Claim of Reason

Wednesday, March 05, 2003

I remember that when we used to play dodge-ball in gym, once I was out I would root against whichever team had fewer players left so as to see the game end more quickly so we could get back in. I felt guilty about rooting against my own team half the time, but there it was.

I remember my technique of mingling among the out-players so that the other team would think I was out, then streaking across the gym to grab a ball and throw it at a surprised opponent.

I remember once being the last member of my team -- Ronnie Rogers then very pompously asked me to "sacrifice myself" -- and nearly single-handedly defeating the ten or so kids left on the other side. It was odd that I should come so close and still lose.

I remember how much it stings to get hit by a ball in the legs, and also how much it can sting your palms to catch the ball. Later, when I played goalie on the soccer team, the soccer ball never stung nearly so much, though it jammed my fingers a lot more.

posted by william 7:19 AM
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